But that would take work! That would be inconvenient!

The whole point of the article is that you can just pretend to do something about the climate emergency, and still feel virtuous, while in fact, doing nothing.

(Good for you. In fact, we did both of these things too. I have never owned an internal combustion engine, and I'm almost 60! I did finally buy a new bicycle, the first in over 40 years, because the junker I had was so dangerous the bike shop would no longer fix it. :-D)